new life

Not sure where I left off & too long to go day by day as so much has changed here is the jest of it,
My son died on Oct.16th 09 my brother died 4 weeks later.........
Update now.
My husband, Steve who has a prosthesis, lower leg who has worked very hard mostly average 55 hours for the last 15 years running EDM machines has now filed for disability and is no longer working.
I'm looking for a job now after being home with my special needs son who is no1 18 I am not sure we will save our home, our income right now is what our son gets for disability with Autism $430.00 a month.
Scary huh? but I know that God will provide our needs, the hard thing is being content with those needs & not desiring more than that because really our home isn't really a NEED, really any roof over our head is ..........
After hating my home for 15 years (we bought it 24 years ago) because it is too small, old, run down. now I could lose it I remember back to the year before Jason died Steve was diagnosed with lung cancer.....found out a week later it was a misdiagnosis he has emphysema but I lay in bed at night begging God to take everything else I have but don't take him from me.

Wow now 3 years later my oldest son is gone, the man I begged God not to take is disabled & showing signs of Alzheimer........do you think God is telling me I need different priorities?
There have been so many changes I will try to just address the outcome of what has happened
And mostly right now I feel nothing worse than losing my son can happen to me.
This time I will try to keep up with this & update I guess until we lose the net.